Don’t fake being okay, you’ll only hurt yourself. Be real with what you’re going through, just don’t let it consume you.
Hmm, looks like my timing of “tonight or tomorrow” is off (a whole lot actually). But, I am posting so go me. This past week had been interesting, good and bad. I did get a whole lot of school done, and started a new (awesome!) show. (its called The Gifted by the way, its Xmen related cause i’m a huge nerd ). I also lost someone who was very important to me( he’s alive, we just don’t alk anymore). Let it be said, that it was his choice. I did nothing that I was aware of, so my hands are clean. When this happened ( Friday night) I was a huge mess. Saturday was way better, and today I was actually happy. I felt like this huge weight was lifted off me, I felt free. Which was nice, although I did miss him. I was sad, then mad, then content. Its hard, but change is good. I went to youth group tonight, and enjoyed it (no panic attacks or drawing on my arm). I actually opened up to people, and I owe it all to Dax. Got to be honest, I’ve never been close with Dax at all. He and I are very different, and i’m just not used to talking to people outside my youth group circle. recently I reached out to the group chat (wassssup youth groupers!) and asked for prayer. I have never been one to ask for things like that, but i’m trying to be more open. And Dax, catching me completely off guard, texts me that he’s always willing to listen. So I talk to him, and he encourages me! He doesn’t just say i’m sorry and move on like most. He actually tries to help, and even started a plan with me on youversion. So, thanks Dax, you helped me get one step closer to a better me. You’re a very strong and kind person. It’s so hard to let people see the real you, there’s always the chance of getting hurt. I know that better than most. But, people can suprise you, so be open. I’ll pass the same advice to all of you that Dax gave to me. Talk to someone! Anyone! If they are really a friend, they will listen! I don’t know what all of you’re going through, but I do know life is hard. We all have troubles, and we tend to think we need to face them alone to avoid hurting others ( or we think there are no others to begin with). But, I strongly urge you to talk. If i know you personally, I am always (ALWAYS) willing to listen, and I am judgment free. I don’t care if your iguana has a problem with its eye, heck I wanna know. I love all of you and you’re not alone. Not one bit, :).
This weeks song is War Paint by Fletcher, its helped me go through this week. I hope it empowers you as much as me!
Suicide hotline: 1-800-273-8255 (just wanted to put that to let you know there is help if you’re considering it)